The Late Bloomer


Touchdown!

Touchdown!

(2016) Romantic Comedy (Momentum) Johnny Simmons, Brittany Snow, J.K. Simmons, Maria Bello, Kumail Nanjiani, Blake Cooper, Paul Wesley, Jane Lynch, Lenora Crichlow, Joey Greer, Matt Jones, Beck Bennett, Jason Antoon, Sam Robards, Ileana Douglas, Laraine Newman, Brian Doyle-Murray, Bobby Flay, Page Tierney, Vanessa Ragland, Lauren Shaw. Directed by Kevin Pollak

 

Puberty is an uncomfortable time for all of us. Most of us remember it with a mixture of wistfulness and downright embarrassment. Most of us wish we could have a do-over for that time in our life. Imagine going through it though when you’re thirty.

For Peter Newman (Simmons), that’s exactly what he’s facing. A successful sex therapist who advocates abstinence in his proto-bestselling book From Sex to Success, he’s had few romantic relationships and *gasp* no sex. Let’s just try and put aside for a moment that a virginal sex therapist is about as useful as a basketball coach who’s never even seen a single game of basketball played before.

Speaking of basketball, while playing a pick-up game a particularly vicious shot to the family jewels sends Peter to the E.R. where he discovers something alarming; there’s a tumor on his pituitary gland. Mind you, it’s benign but its presence kept Peter from entering puberty. Once removed, Peter is going to get the whole enchilada.

Yes that includes acne, inappropriate erections, a massive urge to masturbate and a squeaky, cracking voice at the worst possible moments. Worse yet, his crush – his neighbor Michelle (Snow) who has the world’s most inattentive boyfriend (Wesley) and a dream of becoming a celebrity chef – suddenly becomes the subject of his sexual desires, jeopardizing his friendship with her.

For his friends Rich (Nanjiani) and Luke (Bennett) this becomes the source of great amusement. For his parents (Bello, Simmons) this becomes a long-awaited relief. For his boss (Lynch) it becomes horribly inconvenient just when Peter’s renown is bringing his clinic a ton of new patients and new revenue. For Peter it is sheer torture as everything in his life changes in the wink of an eye.

Believe it or not, this is based on actual events. The subject in question is former E! Network reporter Ken Baker whose book Man Made: A Memoir of My Body is what the movie is based on. Incomprehensibly, the committee of six (!) writers who are responsible for this thing chose to change professions and turn an interesting take on sexuality and puberty into a cross between a raunchy sex comedy and a clichéd rom-com.

Pollak, the same guy with successful stand-up/impressionist and acting careers (if you haven’t seen his impressions of James T. Kirk and Columbo, you’re missing something) was motivated to make a movie out of this story but something tells me that the script wasn’t exactly what he had in mind. Still, the veteran Pollak could call on friends to do him a solid which explains the really top-notch cast. Simmons and Bello shine as Peter’s hippie parents and Lynch as always is dry as a bone in her delivery but charismatic as hell onscreen.

There is certainly room for a great movie here; Baker’s story actually has a good deal of humor in it and some real insight into sexual stereotypes, growing up, and the role of sex in modern society. We really get none of that here; mostly the humor is crude and juvenile which wouldn’t be a bad thing if the jokes were a bit funnier – or to be fair, if more of them were as there are I have to admit some genuine laughs here. There just aren’t enough of them to overcome a script that is riddled with cliches and an ending that recalls the worst aspects of sitcom writing.

REASONS TO GO: A really fascinating subject for a movie.
REASONS TO STAY: Juvenile humor and bland writing-by-committee torpedo what could have been a terrific film.
FAMILY VALUES:  You’ll find plenty of sexual content (much of it of the juvenile variety), profanity and some nudity.
TRIVIAL PURSUIT:  Wesley and Snow previously starred in the short-lived television show American Dreams.
BEYOND THE THEATER: Amazon, Fandango Now, Google Play, iTunes, Netflix, Vudu
CRITICAL MASS: As of 12/6/16: Rotten Tomatoes: 20% positive reviews. Metacritic: 34/100.
COMPARISON SHOPPING: The Forty Year Old Virgin
FINAL RATING: 5/10
NEXT: Billy Lynn’s Long Halftime Walk

The Accountant (2016)


Ben Affleck sets his sights on those who criticized his casting as Batman.

Ben Affleck sets his sights on those who criticized his casting as Batman.

(2016) Thriller (Warner Brothers) Ben Affleck, Anna Kendrick, J.K. Simmons, Jon Bernthal, Jeffrey Tambor, Cynthia Addai-Robinson, John Lithgow, Jean Smart, Andy Umberger, Alison Wright, Jason Davis, Robert C. Treveiler, Mary Kraft, Seth Lee, Jake Presley, Izzy French, Ron Prather, Susan Williams, Gary Basaraba, Fernando Chien, Alex Collins, Sheila Maddox. Directed by Gavin O’Connor

 

Most people have an idea of autism that is decidedly out of step with reality. The truth is that there all sorts of different types of autism and all sorts of different types of autistics. Some are low functioning, unable to take care of themselves and who are requiring of supervision. These are generally the types of autism that we tend to picture when we think about autism at all. Others are high functioning, some to the point where you wouldn’t know they were autistic if they didn’t tell you. The myth about autism that is most pervasive and most untrue is that autism goes hand in hand with mental retardation. Some autistics can be brilliant. Some can even be deadly.

Christian Wolff (Affleck) was born with a gift – a genius at problem solving. He’s a math whiz and able to ferret out patterns you and I could never see. He is also autistic, unable to interact well socially although he’d like to. He has rigid habits that govern his life; his breakfast is the same, every day, arranged on the plate in the very same way. He has his silverware in a drawer, arranged exactly the way he wants them – with no extraneous flatware to clog up his drawers. He likes things simple in his life.

Perhaps that’s because his job is so complex. You see, he’s an accountant and not just for anyone; he uncooks the books for some of the world’s most dangerous criminals, ranging from drug kingpins to assassins to terrorists to warlords. This has attracted the attention of the Treasury Department and it’s lead agent, Ray King (Simmons) who is getting ready to retire but who has been chasing the accountant for years. He wants to get him as a crowning achievement to his career so he enlists agent Marybeth Medina (Addai-Robinson) who is even more brilliant than he.

In the meantime, Wolff has been brought in by a biomedical robotics firm called Living Robotics to investigate some irregularities in their accounting, irregularities unearthed by a junior accountant – the chirpy Dana Cummings (Kendrick). CEO Lamar Black (Lithgow) wants these irregularities cleared up before he takes the company public. Wolff begins his investigation and turns up something – something that puts he and Dana in mortal danger, as a killer named Braxton (Bernthal) shows up to clean house at Living Robotics.

I like the concept here a lot; a high-functioning autistic action hero and Affleck is the perfect choice to play him. Affleck can play closed-off as well as anybody in the business and he shows that skill here. Christian is socially awkward and a little bit wary of social interactions. When Dana starts flirting with him, he’s attracted but he doesn’t know how to react. The scenes between the two are some of the best in the film. The other supporting roles are solid here as well, although Lithgow may have left a few too many tooth marks on the scenery for comfort.

One of the issues I have with the film is that I don’t think O’Connor and screenwriter Bill Dubuque were quite sure whether they wanted to make a thriller or an action film. Perhaps they wanted to make a hybrid of both but the pendulum kept swinging in one direction or the other and it ended up being unsatisfying in that regard. Worse yet, there are several plot twists, including one regarding the Braxton character which may as well have neon arrows pointing to them and blinking graphics screaming “HERE! PLOT TWIST! YOU’LL NEVER GET THIS ONE!!!!!” and of course anyone with a reasonable amount of experience at the movies should figure it out early on.

I like Affleck a lot as an actor; always have, even when his career was in a slump. Heck, I even liked him in Gigli which is saying something. He does elevate this somewhat, as does Kendrick and to a lesser extent, Addai-Robinson and Tambor (whose scenes are all too brief as Wolff’s mentor). It’s enough for me to give this flawed film a mild recommendation. It’s not a movie to write home about but neither is it one to troll Internet forums over. It’s a solidly made bit of entertaining fluff that will keep you occupied and be promptly forgotten. That may be enough in a lot of ways, especially in these stressful times, but it could have been a whole lot more.

REASONS TO GO: Affleck is terrific here and his chemistry with Kendrick is authentic.
REASONS TO STAY: Most of the plot twists are telegraphed and the movie falls apart towards the end.
FAMILY VALUES: There is plenty of violence as well as regular occurrences of profanity
TRIVIAL PURSUIT: While the film is set in Plainfield, Illinois (just outside of Chicago) it was shot in Atlanta where the production company got much better tax incentives than Illinois offered.
CRITICAL MASS: As of 11/12/16: Rotten Tomatoes: 51% positive reviews. Metacritic: 51/100.
COMPARISON SHOPPING: The Transporter
FINAL RATING: 6/10
NEXT: Keeping Up with the Joneses

New Releases for the Week of October 14, 2016


The AccountantTHE ACCOUNTANT

(Warner Brothers) Ben Affleck, Anna Kendrick, J.K. Simmons, Jon Bernthal, Jeffrey Tambor, John Lithgow, Jean Smart, Cynthia Addai-Robinson. Directed by Gavin O’Connor

A young high-functioning autistic boy grows up to be a CPA, a math savant who has Einstein-like genius when it comes to numbers. As an adult, he works under the cover of a small, insignificant CPA office in the Rust Belt with an unbelievable secret to hide. He in fact works for some of the most dangerous criminal organizations on Earth, uncooking their books and protecting their wealth. When he takes on his first legitimate client, a robotics firm where an accounting clerk has uncovered some discrepancies in the books, he discovers that the deadliest clients aren’t always the ones operating outside the law.

See the trailer, clips, interviews and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Thriller
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: R (for strong violence and language throughout)

American Honey

(A24) Sasha Lane, Shia LaBeouf, Riley Keough, McCaul Lombardi. A young adolescent girl living in a house that is nothing like a home impulsively runs away with a crew that sells magazines door to door. Feeling like this is where she belongs, she begins to adjust to the lifestyle of lawless days, hard-partying nights and eventually, the onset of love among the ruins.

See the trailer and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website
.
Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Drama
Now Playing: Regal Winter Park Village

Rating: R (for strong sexual content, graphic nudity, language throughout, drug/alcohol abuse – all involving teens)

Blue Jay

(The Orchard) Mark Duplass, Sarah Paulson, Clu Gallagher. A pair of former sweethearts from a small California mountain town has returned home for separate reasons and meet up unexpectedly in a grocery store. Although both have gone on to separate lives they find themselves reconnecting as if no time at all has passed. Filmed in black and white and starring the irrepressible Duplass who was one of the guests of honor at this year’s Florida Film Festival.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Drama
Now Playing: Enzian Theater

Rating: NR

Denial

(Bleecker Street) Rachel Weisz, Timothy Spall, Tom Wilkinson, Andrew Scott. A history scholar is sued for libel in Britain when she is accused of labeling a writer a Holocaust denier. In order to prove her innocence (in the United Kingdom, the burden of proof is on the defendant in libel cases) she must prove that the Holocaust actually occurred, a much more difficult feat as it turned out than at first it sounded.

See the trailer, clips and a featurette here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: True Life Drama
Now Playing: Regal Winter Park Village

Rating: PG-13 (for thematic material and brief strong language)

Desierto

(STX Entertainment) Gael Garcia Bernal, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Alondra Hidalgo, Diego Cataño. A group of immigrants navigating the treacherous border crossing from Mexico into the United States find they have an additional obstacle to overcome. They are being stalked by a psychopath with a high powered rifle who starts picking off the group one by one.

See the trailer, interviews, clips and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Thriller
Now Playing: AMC Disney Springs, Regal The Loop

Rating: R (for strong violence and language)

The Greasy Strangler

(FilmRise) Michael St. Michaels, Sky Elobar, Elizabeth De Razzo, Gil Gex. A degenerate father and his brow-beaten son run a disco-themed walking tour of L.A. When a sexy young woman takes the tour, both father and son end up competing for her attention. At about the same time, a serial killer of women begins a reign of terror in Los Angeles. This gross yet compelling film played at the Florida Film Festival this past April.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Horror Comedy
Now Playing: Enzian Theater

Rating: NR

Kevin Hart: What Now?

(Universal) Kevin Hart, Halle Berry, Don Cheadle, Ed Helms. Last year Kevin Hart performed to 50,000 people in Philadelphia’s Lincoln Stadium, the first time a stand-up comic had performed to capacity in a stadium venue. The show was filmed for theatrical release, but some framing material, casting Hart as a sort of tiny James Bond is also included.

See the trailer, interviews and clips here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Comedy/Documentary
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: R (for some sexual material, and language throughout)

Max Steel

(Open Road) Maria Bello, Andy Garcia, Ben Winchell, Josh Brener. A young boy who has the ability to generate a powerful energy force is befriended by a techno-organic alien. The two together form Max Steel, a superhero more powerful than any on Earth. Unfortunately, they have enemies after them – from this world and beyond.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Superhero
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: PG-13 (for sci-fi action violence)

Miss Sharon Jones!

(Starz Digital Media) Sharon Jones, Alex Kadvan, Austen Holman. Sharon Jones is one of the greatest soul singers of the 21st century. She and her band the Dap-Kings have been wowing audiences all throughout the world over the past couple of decades. The challenges that she faced in the music business were nothing like what she faced in her own life, as this documentary captures the essence of an exemplary artist who is also a strong, brave woman.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Musical Documentary
Now Playing: Enzian Theater

Rating: NR

Priceless

(Roadside Attractions) David Koechner, Joel Smallbone, Jim Parrack, Bianca A. Santos. A widower, already reeling from the death of his wife, loses custody of his daughter on top of his bereavement. At rock bottom, he gets a new job driving a truck cross country – no questions asked. When he discovers what the cargo is, however, he’ll be confronted by an agonizing choice.

See the trailer and clips here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Romance
Now Playing: AMC Altamonte Mall, Regal Waterford Lakes

Rating: NR

Zootopia


Only someone crazy like a fox could smile at the DMV.

Only someone crazy like a fox could smile at the DMV.

(2016) Animated Feature (Disney) Starring the voices of Jason Bateman, Ginnifer Goodwin, Idris Elba, Jenny Slate, Nate Torrence, J.K. Simmons, Bonnie Hunt, Don Lake, Tommy Chong, Octavia Spencer, Alan Tudyk, Shakira, Raymond S. Persi, Della Saba, Maurice LaMarche, Phil Johnston, Tiny Lister, Fuschia!, John DiMaggio, Katie Lowes, Kath Soucie. Directed by Byron Howard, Rich Moore and Jared Bush

In the animal kingdom, there are different, distinct roles; some are predators, others are prey. The law of the jungle has existed for as long as there’s been in jungle. Predators and prey generally don’t become friends.

That’s not how it is in Zootopia, a metropolis in which anthropomorphic animals live in peace and harmony. “Anyone can become anything” is the motto, and for Judy Hoppe (Goodwin), a perky rabbit living on a carrot farm in the sticks (sorry, couldn’t resist) “anything” means a police officer, something no rabbit has ever achieved.

So despite the deep misgivings of her Mom (Hunt) and Dad (Lake), she heads for the big city and against all odds, graduates the academy and becomes part of a new initiative from Mayor Lionheart (Simmons) to integrate more mammals into the police force much to the disgust of Chief Bogo (Elba), she joins the central city force. Except that Bogo, having little regard for what skills she might possess, assigns her to meter maid duties.

With the encouragement of Assistant Mayor Bellwether (Slate), an overworked sheep, she perseveres and when an opportunity to take a missing persons…,er, animals case, she plunges in with both paws. With the only clue leading to smug con-fox Nick Wilde (Bateman), the two traditional enemies become partners, and eventually learn to respect and care for each other. However, their investigation turns up a massive plot whose origins lead deep into the corridors of power in Zootopia.

Disney has hit another one out of the ballpark from a box office standpoint and it’s easy to see why. For one thing, kids love their animals and what’s not to love about cuddly rabbits and smug foxes, even if the main fox here looks identical to the title character of Robin Hood – Ooo de lally. Not a problem for the younger set, but for veteran Disneyphiles, it can be distracting.

The movie tackles some pretty complex and timely subjects; the division of people into categories (left and right) is not dissimilar as to what you see in Zootopia. While the movie was written before the advent of Trump as a viable presidential candidate, much of the issues being brought up around that candidacy make up the subtext here. No doubt the bean counters at the Mouse House are quite thankful for The Donald’s controversial campaign right about now.

The voices are cast almost perfectly; Goodwin, who portrays a plucky warrior princess in the hit TV show Once Upon a Time transmits the inner core of that character to the animated feature without making the characters too similar. Bateman, a natural wiseass, also inhabits Nick to a “T” carrying the smug smooth-talking con artist off much as he did in Bad Words. The interaction between the two is genuine and warm, and makes it easy to root for the both of them.

There are a ton of in-jokes, from references to other Disney and Pixar movies (including a hell of a lot that are not but make sense in any case) and to gags based on the theme parks and Disney merch. It’s a little bit Shrek­-like in the rapid fire cultural touchstones but that doesn’t mean it won’t delight adults as well as kids. However, the storyline is a bit derivative even if the subject matter is pretty high on the food chain for a kid’s movie. I suspect there will be a little bit of discussion about this movie long after it’s passed from it’s theatrical run. It probably could have used some judicious trimming, about ten minutes worth I’d say.

Disney’s designers and animators also deserve kudos for the overall environment of Zootopia. Divided into a number of zones – rain forest, sub-Saharan desert, rural farmland, savanna, and even a miniature city for the mice and other smaller creatures, each one is imaginative and believable. Zootopia is a place you’d want to visit – even if you have just the two paws.

REASONS TO GO: Complex story concept. Nice interplay between Nick and Judy.
REASONS TO STAY: A little bit derivative. It’s also a little bit long.
FAMILY VALUES: A bit of rude humor, some mild thematic elements and animated action.
TRIVIAL PURSUIT: The original concept had the story revolving around Nick Wilde but when early test audiences didn’t identify strongly with the character, the decision was made to make Judy Hoppe the focus and the film was re-edited.
CRITICAL MASS: As of 3/16/16: Rotten Tomatoes: 99% positive reviews. Metacritic: 78/100.
COMPARISON SHOPPING: Monsters, Inc.
FINAL RATING: 7.5/10
NEXT: The Brainwashing of My Dad

New Releases for the Week of March 4, 2016


ZootopiaZOOTOPIA

(Disney) Starring the voices of Jason Bateman, Ginnfer Goodwin, Idris Elba, Bonnie Hunt, J.K Simmons, Shakira, Alan Tudyk, Octavia Spencer. Directed by Byron Howard, Rich Moore and Jared Bush

In a city populated by anthropomorphic mammals, a determined bunny means to prove herself on a police force of tougher, stronger animals. Her partner, a fast-talking scam artist who wants nothing more than to fly under the radar, is not amused by her ambitions. When she takes on a high-profile case, she drags her reluctant partner into the seedier side of Zootopia.

See the trailer, clips, interviews and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard, 3D
Genre: Animated Feature
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: PG (for some thematic elements, rude humor and action)

45 Years

(Sundance Selects) Charlotte Rampling, Tom Courtenay, Geraldine James, Dolly Wells. An English couple planning a big celebration for their 45th wedding anniversary is devastated when a secret from the husband’s past resurfaces. The revelation opens up old wounds that have been festering over time and creates a new dynamic within the couple that threaten the harmony they’ve worked all their lives to build. Rampling was nominated for an Oscar for her performance here; read the review for this tomorrow.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Drama
Now Playing: Enzian Theater

Rating: R (for language and brief sexuality)

The Boy and the Beast

(FUNimation) Starring the voices of Eric Vale, John Swasey, Monica Rial, Bryn Apprill. A young orphan discovers an entire world of sentient beasts whose world co-exists next to ours. He is discovered by the enigmatic and somewhat eccentric Kumatetsu, who takes the young human child on as an apprentice. The unlikely pair grow to respect each other, learn from each other and eventually become friends. However when an evil threatens both worlds, the two will have to fight side by side to save both of their worlds…or die side by side.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Anime
Now Playing: AMC Disney Springs, AMC Loew’s Universal Cineplex

Rating: PG-13 (for some violence and language)

Boy and the World

(GKIDS) Starring the voices of Vinicius Garcia, Felipe Zilse, Alé Abreu, Lu Horta. A young boy in rural Brazil finds his life shattered when his father leaves for the big city. Determined to find him and reunite his family, the boy sets out into a world much bigger than the one he’s known all his life. This Brazilian film was nominated for a Best Animated Feature Oscar.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Animated Feature
Now Playing: AMC Disney Springs

Rating: PG (for thematic material and images)

London Has Fallen

(Focus) Gerard Butler, Aaron Eckhart, Morgan Freeman, Angela Bassett. In London for the funeral of the Prime Minister, the leaders of the western world are ambushed by a well-coordinated, well-financed terrorist group which aims to bring the West to its knees, particularly the United States. However, they didn’t reckon on a Secret Service agent who knows how to protect the president when the odds are against them.

See the trailer, clips, interviews and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Action
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: R (for strong violence and language throughout)

The Mermaid

(Sony/Momentum) Chao Deng, Jelly Lin, Show Luo, Yuqi Zhang. When a developer’s project threatens to destroy the civilization of mermaids and incidentally all marine life, one of the mermaids is dispatched to kill him. In fine Chinese film fashion, she falls in love with him instead which exposes a secret organization dedicating to destroying all mermaids. The two lovers will have to unite to save the day. The latest from Stephen Chow broke all Chinese box office records last year.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Martial Arts Fantasy
Now Playing: Regal Pointe Orlando, Regal Waterford Lakes

Rating: R (for some violence)

The Other Side of the Door

(20th Century Fox) Sarah Wayne Callies, Jeremy Sisto, Sofia Rosinsky, Javier Botet. A grief-stricken young mother mourns the loss of her son in a tragic accident on an idyllic Greek island. However, when she learns of a temple which may be a place where life and the afterlife meet, she goes there and against the warnings of others opens the door, releasing things into our world which shouldn’t be here and threatening the balance between life and death.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Horror
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: R (for some bloody violence)

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot

(Paramount) Tina Fey, Margot Robbie, Martin Freeman, Alfred Molina. Kim Barker is a woman trying to make it in journalism, which remains in many ways a man’s world. So when the opportunity to go to Afghanistan to cover the war comes up, she takes it despite being advised not to. This true story shows what it’s like to be a woman in a man’s world doing a job that most men would be terrified to do.

See the trailer, clips, interviews and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website.

Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Biographical Dramedy
Now Playing: Wide Release

Rating: R (for pervasive language, some sexual content, drug use and violent war images)

Kung Fu Panda 3


Pandas and rabbits and pigs, oh my!!!

Pandas and rabbits and pigs, oh my!!!

(2016) Animated Feature (DreamWorks Animation) Starring the voices of Jack Black, Bryan Cranston, Angelina Jolie, Dustin Hoffman, Jackie Chan, Seth Rogen, David Cross, J.K. Simmons, Lucy Liu, Kate Hudson, Randall Duk Kim, Steele Gagnon, Liam Knight, Wayne Knight, Al Roker, Barbara Dirickson, Willie Geist, Fred Tatasciore, Ming Tsai, April Hong. Directed by Jennifer Yuh Nelson and Allesandro Carloni

Know thyself is a long-standing axiom, but it is hard to know who you are when you don’t know where you come from, or from who. It can leave us with a sense of feeling lost, floundering in a dark sea without any reference points.

You would think Po (Black) has at least some sense of who he is. After all, he is the Dragon Warrior. But he’s also an orphan, raised by Mr. Ping (Hong), the noodle vendor – who happens to be a duck to Po’s panda. Po has just figured that he was the only one.

But there is trouble brewing. In the spirit world, renegade General Kai (Simmons) has been stealing the chi (lifeforce) of all the great masters in the afterlife, which seems problematic at best considering they’re all dead. He’s even managed to grab the chi of Master Oogway (Kim). However, Oogway has a trick up his sleeve, one that is not revealed until later.

The addition of Master Oogway’s chi has given Kai enough power to return to the mortal world where he plans on gathering up all the chi of all the kung fu masters on the planet, culminating with the Dragon Warrior’s. The Dragon Warrior however is very much distracted. Master Shifu (Hoffman) is retiring and he wants Po to take over training the Furious Five, which is disastrous. The appearance of Li (Cranston), who turns out to be Po’s long-lost dad, leads Po and his adopted father Ping to the farthest reaches of China to the secret village of the pandas, where he meets all his long lost relatives.

Po is ecstatic and happy having found not just his people but himself but still has been unable to master chi, something that the pandas were reputed to be masters of. When the news arrives that Kai has beaten the Furious Five save for Tigress (Jolie) and he is on his way to the hidden panda village, Po realizes that there is no way he can beat Kai by himself. He is going to need an army – of pandas. But how to make these lazy, dumpling-eating, hill rolling creatures, as gentle as can be, an army?

The third installment in the KFP franchise has done pretty well at the box office despite its January release date and competition from Star Wars: The Force Awakens. However, of the three films in the trilogy (and this is supposedly the last one as the studio has revealed no further plans to continue the franchise at present, although the success of this movie leads me to think that DreamWorks might be reconsidering that decision) this is the weakest to my eye.

Many of the characters who made the series a success are limited to essentially cameo roles. Hoffman as Master Shifu is limited to maybe a couple of dozen lines after being essentially a main character for the first two films and the Furious Five are mainly an afterthought, appearing together in just one scene. While there are plenty of new characters to make an impression here (including Hudson as a seductive ribbon dancing panda), Kai as a villain seems no different than either of the first two villains, supernatural origin or no.

Black is earnest enough as Po and continues to center the franchise as a character who is slowly learning to believe in himself, which also is getting a bit tired but I suppose if you’re going to be child-oriented as an animated feature, a simple lesson in self-belief or being who you want to be needs to be front and center. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, only that there is nothing here that really stands out from any other animated feature out there.

Maybe I wasn’t in the right mood for a kidflick, particularly in an auditorium full of noxious little brats who were plainly too young or too undisciplined to be in a movie theater but this one left me pretty flat. In many ways this is not quite as good as the second film which got a similar rating, but I didn’t see enough wrong with this one to go down a notch. I got the sense the kids enjoyed the movie (particularly the little boys) and that the parents were more or less happy that their tykes weren’t at home driving them crazy. And that’s not really what I’d consider reason enough to see a film with the kids, animated or not.

REASONS TO GO: Plenty of fun new characters.
REASONS TO STAY: Left me feeling pretty “meh.”
FAMILY VALUES: Some animated martial arts action and slightly rude humor.
TRIVIAL PURSUIT: Has the longest time between sequels for any DreamWorks Animation film with five years.
CRITICAL MASS: As of 2/23/16: Rotten Tomatoes: 82% positive reviews. Metacritic: 65/100.
COMPARISON SHOPPING: The Tigger Movie
FINAL RATING: 5/10
NEXT: The Witch

Dark Skies


Things that go bump in the night.

Things that go bump in the night.

(2013) Sci-Fi Horror (Dimension) Keri Russell, Josh Hamilton, Dakota Goyo, Kadan Rockett, J.K. Simmons, L.J. Benet, Rich Hutchman, Myndy Crist, Anne Thurman, Jake Washburn, Ron Ostrow, Tom Costello, Marion Kerr, Alyvia Alyn Lind, Josh Stamberg, Tiffany Jeneen, Brian Stepanek, Judith Moreland, Adam Schneider, Jessica Borden Directed by Scott Stewart

6 Days of Darkness 2015

In one’s home, one feels secure, safe as if locked doors and a deadbolt can keep the outside world at bay. The terrors of the outside world however are insidious and some of them can’t be deterred by a closed door or a security alarm.

Daniel Barrett (Hamilton) is an unemployed architect unable to find a job in a recession-era environment. His wife Lacy (Russell) is a real estate agent in a market when NOBODY is buying houses. They are surviving on her meager income and the bills are rapidly becoming an issue that is affecting their relationship.

Their kids Jesse (Goyo) – the eldest – and Sam (Rockett) – the youngest – are aware that their parents are under some strain but don’t really know why. And then some odd things begin to happen. They find the refrigerator door open and all the vegetables eaten. The canned and packaged food is stacked up in a neat pile on the kitchen table. The chandelier over the table begins projecting strange symbols on the ceiling.

The incidents begin to escalate. Sammy has some kind of seizure during a soccer game. Lacy witnesses hundreds of birds flying into their home and killing themselves. Lacy sees an alien figure standing over Sammy’s bed who disappears when she turns on the light. As the incidents get worse and worse, Lacy does some research and comes up with a single cause – U.F.O.s. She consults an expert (Simmons) who tells them that these cases usually end up in child abduction.

That night, which happens to be the Fourth of July, Daniel and Lacy load up for bear, sealing up their home and awaiting an alien onslaught. But how can you fight an enemy you can’t see – and whose motivations you don’t know?

There have been plenty of alien abduction movies ranging from Communion to The X-Files: Fight the Future. Where does this one stack up on the list? Somewhere in the middle. Director Stewart, whose background is in visual effects, manages to set a great suburban environment where everything is normal – at least normal for this time and place. At first the villains are purely financial – bill collectors and the possibility they might lose their home bring in modern horror we can all relate to.

But as the movie goes on, it slowly begins to come off the rails until it builds to a climax that is to put it mildly disappointing. I can’t stress enough that this is a movie with enormous potential that you watch with a stupefied catatonic expression on your face as it completely blows it.

Keri Russell is a really fine actress and normally she can be relied upon to keep a film centered but here, she – like everyone else in the cast – overacts almost to the point of parody. All the gestures are wild and overbearing; all the dialogue delivered like they’re pronouncements rather than lines. I have never seen a movie in which there was such universal scene chewing as this one, or at least none that I can remember.

The two actors playing the kids – Royo and Rockett – are completely unconvincing and as wooden as a treehouse. I get that having children put in jeopardy is part of the movie’s whole reason to be, but at least make the children believable. I can’t believe they couldn’t find better juvenile actors than these.

The most major failing however is that this sci-fi horror movie isn’t as scary as it could be. For one thing, we never see the aliens clearly. If you’re going to have an alien movie, the least you can do is show us the aliens. And as the ending dives over the cliff of futility, the sense of jeopardy that the director worked so hard to establish disappears entirely. By the end of the movie you’ll be hard-pressed not to check the time.

The first half of the movie is actually pretty terrific and if they’d maintained the momentum they set up, this could have been a horror classic. Instead we get a movie that is a bit of a mess. There are definitely some features worth exploring here but overall this is fairly unsatisfying and despite a decent cast, falters in nearly every important way.

WHY RENT THIS: Establishes a sense of normalcy. Hits close to home.
WHY RENT SOMETHING ELSE: Abundant overacting. Not scary enough.
FAMILY VALUES: Situations of terror, a fair amount of violence, some sexual material, a little bit of drug use and a fair amount of foul language.
TRIVIAL PURSUIT: Dark Skies was also the original title for Sharknado.
NOTABLE HOME VIDEO EXTRAS: None listed.
BOX OFFICE PERFORMANCE: $26.4M on a $3.5M production budget.
SITES TO SEE: Netflix, Amazon, iTunes, Flixster, Vudu , M-Go
COMPARISON SHOPPING: Fire in the Skies
FINAL RATING: 4.5/10
NEXT: Six Days of Darkness continues!

Terminator Genisys


I just want to set the world on fire...

I just want to set the world on fire…

(2015) Science Fiction (Paramount) Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jason Clarke, Jai Courtney, Emilia Clarke, J.K. Simmons, Dayo Okeniyi, Matthew Smith, Courtney B. Vance, Byung-hun Lee, Michael Gladis, Sandrine Holt, Wayne Bastrup, Gregory Alan Williams, Otto Sanchez, Matty Ferraro, Griff Furst, Ian Etheridge, Nolan Gross, Seth Meriwether, Afemo Omilami, Teri Wyble. Directed by Alan Taylor

Some franchises seem to need little encouragement to be creative. Some tell a single story over the course of several films. Others essentially make the same movie over and over again.

The War Against the Machines is reaching it’s end; John Connor (J.Clarke) and his troops are storming an L.A. prison camp which hides Skynet’s secret weapon even as another brigade is storming the main server complex in Colorado. Complete victory is within their grasp; except that Skynet has sent a Terminator (Schwarzenegger) back in time to assassinate Sarah Connor (E. Clarke), his mother, before he can be born. John sends his right hand man, Kyle Reese (Courtney) back in time to stop the unstoppable cyborg.

Sounds familiar right? But this isn’t a reboot. When Reese gets there he discovers the Terminator has already been dispatched – by another Terminator, reprogrammed and sent back further in time to save Sarah – and now to save all of them from a liquid metal T-1000 (Lee) that is nearly impossible to destroy, but clever Sarah manages to find a way.

Now, they have a chance to stop Judgment Day itself but something is wrong with the timeline. Reese saw John getting attacked just before he was sent back in time and now Judgment Day isn’t in 1997 but in 2017. And the means that the nuclear holocaust will be achieved is through a new operating system, Genisys, that will link up everybody and everything – including the nukes. With the aging Terminator whom Sarah calls Pops – as he keeps insisting, he’s old not obsolete – the two will try to save the world from Skynet one last time but Skynet has an ace up it’s sleeve that nobody foresaw – except those who saw Paramount’s second trailer for the movie that spoils one of the biggest and unexpected twists that could have been this summer.

The Terminator franchise has seen better days. The first two films in the franchise were box office smashes and are beloved of science fiction and action film fans alike. The last two have done decent financial numbers but both critics and fans alike have excoriated both of them. Where in that demarcation does this one fall?

The latter, unfortunately. Critics have given this a spanking as you can see by the numbers below and fans have been essentially unimpressed. To be honest, I can’t say that this is one of the better movies in the series but it isn’t the worst either – Terminator Salvation gets that dubious honor – and quite frankly I think it holds up pretty well, despite the critical lambasting it has taken.

]Schwarzenegger, who essentially just made cameos during the last two films which were both filmed during his gubernatorial days but is fully back here and he steals the show. Arnold has never been the greatest of actors (though he has improved) but he’s always had a load of charisma. He manages to play the sympathetic Terminator nicely with genuinely horrifying attempts at a human smile, and a few unintentionally funny quips.

Too bad Arnold as a robot is more lifelike than the human characters. Jason Clarke has shown himself to be a capable lead actor in Life on Mars and in other films, but here he seems terribly lost. I’m not sure if he just required better direction, or any direction but I get the sense that he’s not sure how to play this messianic character and so plays him without much to recommend him by. At least he does a better job than Christian Bale did.

Courtney, who has been a villain in the Hunger Games movies does a mite better, but again seems a bit over his head. The same could be said for Emilia Clarke who has turned heads in Game of Thrones but seems strident and unlikable here instead of tough. Makes one wish her colleague in Thrones, Lena Headey, would have been the one asked to take the role here. She did a far better job in The Sarah Connor Chronicles.

The action sequences are better than average and the special effects likewise. Where the movie really falls down is in the story; it’s so convoluted, with parallel timelines and all sorts of techno babble which ends up slowing the momentum of the movie down at key moments (in one incredible sequence, four different characters try explain a plot point four times to a disbelieving character which is just beyond comprehension why anyone writing a major summer movie would do that. I think they should have simplified things a little or just didn’t explain anything and let the audience just go with it. They would have been better off in the long run. However, fans of the series might be interested to know that there will be at least two more movies made; Paramount has already greenlit them because the rights to the franchise revoke back to James Cameron in 2019 so the studio intends to get as much return from their investment as possible. I hope that the audience does, too.

REASONS TO GO: Some fine summer entertainment and eye candy. Schwarzenegger is clearly having fun.
REASONS TO STAY: Convoluted plot. A little too much like previous entries in the franchise.
FAMILY VALUES: A good deal of sci-fi violence and gun fighting, some partial nudity and a few choice words here and there.
TRIVIAL PURSUIT: Jason Clarke is the fifth actor to play John Connor. Rusty Griswold of the Vacation series has also had five actors in the same role, the only characters known to have that many different actors playing them.
CRITICAL MASS: As of 7/12/15: Rotten Tomatoes: 27% positive reviews. Metacritic: 38/100.
COMPARISON SHOPPING: I, Robot
FINAL RATING: 6.5/10
NEXT: Desire for Beauty

New Releases for the Week of July 3, 2015


Terminator GenisysTERMINATOR: GENISYS

(Paramount) Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jason Clarke, Jai Courtney, Emilia Clarke, J.K. Simmons, Dayo Okeniyi, Matt Smith, Courtney B. Vance. Directed by Alan Taylor

We’ve seen this one before; human resistance leader John Connor discovers that Skynet has sent a terminator cyborg back in time to kill his mother. He needs someone to protect her and brave Kyle Reese volunteers. Except when he gets back in time, things are a lot different than what John Connor remembered – and Sarah Connor is a whole lot tougher than John ever knew. She has a plan to keep Judgment Day from happening, but Skynet is going all out to ensure that it does.

See the trailer, clips, interviews, a promo and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website .
Release Formats: Standard, 3D, IMAX 3D (opened Wednesday)
Genre: Science Fiction
Now Playing: Wide Release
Rating: PG-13 (for intense sequences of sci-fi violence and gunplay throughout, partial nudity and brief strong language)

Aloft

(Sony Classics) Jennifer Connelly, Cillian Murphy, Melanie Laurent, Oona Chaplin. A woman abandons her son; he seeks answers, cutting himself off from feeling anything in order to bear the weight of a crushing tragedy. A woman who is obsessed with curing herself leaves everything she knows behind in a desperate attempt to follow her dream. All three will meet where past and present merge in an exciting film set in the mysterious and beautiful Arctic.

See the trailer and clips here.
For more on the movie this is the website.
Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Drama
Now Playing: Regal Winter Park Village
Rating: R (for language and some sensuality)

Faith of Our Fathers

(Goldwyn/Pure Flix) Kevin Downes, David A.R. White, Stephen Baldwin, Candace Cameron Bure. As the Vietnam War is at its height, two new fathers report for duty – one a cynic, the other devout. They send to their new sons letters hand-written from in country. Years later their sons – now grown men – make a pilgrimage to the Vietnam War monument in Washington DC. They will meet as strangers but they will share a common bond – loving fathers whose bonds cannot be shattered by the chaos of war.

See the trailer here.
For more on the movie this is the website.
Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Faith-Based Drama
Now Playing: AMC Altamonte Mall, AMC Downtown Disney, AMC West Oaks, Regal Oviedo Mall, Regal Pointe Orlando, Regal Winter Park Village
Rating: PG-13 (for sexual content, drug material, language and some thematic elements)

Magic Mike XXL

(Warner Brothers) Channing Tatum, Amber Heard, Jada Pinkett Smith, Elizabeth Banks. Three years after Magic Mike, the legendary headliner of the Kings of Tampa hung up his g-string for good, the troupe is ready to call it a day. However, they want one last blow-out at a festival in Myrtle Beach and they convince Mike to dance one last time. On a road trip with stops in Jacksonville and Savannah, the boys will learn that it takes more than moves to be legendary.

See the trailer, clips, interviews and B-roll video here.
For more on the movie this is the website.
Release Formats: Standard (opened Wednesday)
Genre: Dramedy
Now Playing: Wide Release
Rating: R (for strong sexual content, pervasive language, some nudity and drug use)

The Overnight

(The Orchard) Adam Scott, Jason Schwartzman, Taylor Schilling, Judith Godreche. Newly arrived in Los Angeles, a young couple with their young son know nobody in the trendy Silver Lake district. A chance meeting at a birthday party gets them invited to a pizza dinner with the young son who their own son has become fast friends with and his sophisticated parents. Once the kids are put to bed, things get very, very strange very, very fast. Not only has this been getting a huge buzz but this was one of the more acclaimed films at the recent Florida Film Festival and you can read my review of the movie here.

See the trailer and clips here.
For more on the movie this is the website.
Release Formats: Standard
Genre: Sex Comedy
Now Playing: AMC West Oaks, Regal Winter Park Village
Rating: R (for sexuality/nudity and language)

Whiplash


J.K. Simmons (right) prepares to march to a different drummer.

J.K. Simmons (right) prepares to march to a different drummer.

(2014) Drama (Sony Classics) Miles Teller, J.K. Simmons, Paul Reiser, Melissa Benoist, Austin Stowell, Nate Lang, Chris Mulkey, Damon Gupton, Max Kasch, Suanne Spoke, Charlie Ian, Jayson Blair, Kofi Siriboe, Kavita Patil, C.J. Vana, Tarik Lowe, Tyler Kimball, Rogelio Douglas Jr., Adrian Burks, Calvin C. Winbush, Joseph Bruno, April Grace. Directed by Damien Chazelle

Genius, by itself, is useless. Genius needs to be trained. Genius needs to be focused. Greatness is something that is earned, not given. Genius isn’t enough. Hard work, preparation and practice is what turns genius into greatness.

Andrew Neyland (Teller) aspires to greatness. He longs to be the next Buddy Rich. He is a gifted drummer and those gifts have gotten him accepted into the Shaffer Conservatory of Music, one of the best in the country located (of course) in New York City. There are a variety of different student bands in the Conservative but the one everyone wants to be in is the Studio Band led by Terrence Fletcher (Simmons), himself a professional jazz pianist. It is the band that the Conservatory sends out to win competitions. Most of those in the band are juniors and seniors.

Andrew is a Freshman and stuck in the Nassau band as an alternate drummer to Ryan (Stowell). as gregarious and likable as Andrew is arrogant and unlikable. While Andrew is practicing alone one day, he is observed by Fletcher who is critical of the boy. Andrew figures that he has a ways to go before he can impress the man he most wants to impress.

However a few days later Fletcher shows up at rehearsal for Nassau and demands to hear the drummers do double time swing beats. He listens to Ryan and Andrew as well, and then selects Andrew to come aboard the Studio band to be the alternate. Andrew is over the moon about this but soon sees the pressure the kids in Studio are under. The lead drummer, Tanner (Lang), is a miserable bundle of nerves hostile to what he perceives as competition.

He has good reason to be hostile. When Tanner asks Andrew to hold onto his sheet music before a competition, Andrew loses it. Since Tanner doesn’t know the beats by heart and Andrew does, he gets the core chair and Tanner gets to sit in the alternate’s chair. Andrew’s performance meets the standards of Fletcher and the Studio Band wins the competition.

 

Fletcher is a tyrannical teacher, one who teaches through humiliation and intimidation. All of the students are terrified at being the subject of his wrath but it moves Andrew to try harder. Andrew’s obsession with becoming legendary has begun to affect his relationship with his girlfriend Nicole (Benoist) as well as with his father (Reiser) and family.

But the all-out pursuit of perfection is taking its toll on Andrew and he’s completely lost perspective which only causes Fletcher to drive him harder, further. Will Andrew achieve the greatness that he so desires? Or will Fletcher break him entirely?

Chazelle originally had troubles getting financing for the script he wrote, so he condensed it down to a short which he took to Sundance in 2013. The response was so positive that he was able to secure financing and make a feature film which he brought back to Sundance this year. It earned raves and the Audience Award. I can say that those raves and awards are well-earned.

The movie is as intense an experience as you’re likely to have at theaters this year. The battle of wills between Fletcher and Andrew is incendiary; you can almost see the sparks flying. Some critics have complained that a teacher like Fletcher would quickly and quietly be let go once allegations of abuse reached administrative ears. All I can say is that may be true in today’s lawsuit-happy world but that Chazelle based his script on his own experiences in music school so that must be taken into account.

The performances here are riveting. Teller is never better as the ambitious and obsessed Andrew. This Tampa-area native has great things ahead of him if performances like this are any indication. That Andrew is so basically unlikable – his arrogance and lack of perspective coupled with an occasional condescending tone to his conversation make him a hard guy to like – but we end up rooting for him anyway is a testament to Teller’s skills.

For me though, Simmons is the main attraction. Long a capable character actor with TV roles that include  the neo-Nazi Vernon Schillinger in Oz, a recurring role on Law and Order and the Farmer’s Insurance commercials, he has had few leads in movies as he does in The Music Never Stopped, he does exemplary work. Here he gets to cut loose as the autocratic and sadistic Fletcher. I wouldn’t necessarily characterize him as a villain but in essence that’s what he is and Simmons gives the character depth – an ability to charm one moment and be terrifying the next. I’m not saying that an Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor is a sure bet but it should be.

The soundtrack mainly of jazz standards is an extra added attraction. Those unfamiliar with orchestral jazz can get a pretty decent primer on some of the best examples of that musical form, including Duke Ellington’s “Caravan,”  Stan Getz’ “Intoit” and Hank Levy’s “Whiplash” are mostly not performed by their original musicians but they are competently done here by my limited expertise.

The cost of greatness is staggering, taking a toll on family and friends alike in addition to the pursuer of greatness themselves. It can be an often-lonely undertaken and as many times as not few people other than the person in question believe in their ability to achieve that greatness. That pursuit and its costs are at the center of the movie. You have to end up asking whether it is better to be famous and alone or to be happy and unknown. Andrew seems to think it is.

The ending of the film is left subject to the interpretation of the viewer. Is it redemption, submission or madness? Who won, if anyone? These are points to ponder on your own but be warned there are no easy answers. I consider myself a fairly decent student of story but I’m still mulling it over what really happened at the end of the movie. I’ll probably be thinking about it for awhile. And that, my friends, is the true mark of cinematic greatness.

REASONS TO GO: As intense a movie as you’ll see this year. Extraordinary performances from Simmons and Teller. Great soundtrack.
REASONS TO STAY: Neither Andrew nor Fletcher are particularly nice characters. Some may find Fletcher’s tactics unrealistic in an age of lawsuits.
FAMILY VALUES: Some fairly rough language including a few sexual references.
TRIVIAL PURSUIT: Teller has actually played the drums since he was 15 years old. Even so, he took additional lessons to learn jazz drumming techniques which are less conventional than rock drumming. He developed some intense blisters during filming and some of the blood on the sticks and on the drumset is Teller’s real blood.
CRITICAL MASS: As of 11/18/14: Rotten Tomatoes: 97% positive reviews. Metacritic: 87/100.
COMPARISON SHOPPING: Dark Matter
FINAL RATING: 9.5/10
NEXT: Broken City